Reasons To Quit Smoking – 101 Funny & Not-so-Funny Incentives

By: Jarret Kray



"Give me a lever long enough and a fulcrum on which to place it, and I shall move the world."-- Archimedes

Do you have a “long enough lever” in your life to quit smoking? With long list of reasons, you can do anything - even quit smoking.

(Ordered chronologically and by importance) 1. Wasting money on killing yourself 2. Smelling like an ashtray 3. Your bland taste buds 4. The embarrassing smoking smell of your 5. Even coffee tastes worst 6. Wondering if someone is going to get sick from riding in your “smoker’s” car 7. Your home won’t stink 8. The whizzing when you breathe 9. You alright get enough lung population by living in the city 10. You won’t have to move to the country to breath clean air 11. Poor circulation 12. Low energy 13. Feeling gorse 14. No amount of gum covers your ashtray breath 15. Yellow teeth 16. Yellow Stained fingers 17. Living an extra 7 years 18. Accomplishing what only 3.5% of smokers do a year*: quitting for a year or longer (According to the Surgeon General's Report, 1990) 19. Grayish dull complexion caused by smoking 20. Preventing premature aging without surgery or fancy creams 21. Scaly skin caused by smoking 22. Having to look for a cigarette 23. Having to ask for a light 24. Those millions of thoughts about smoking 25. Wasting time planning your smoke breaks Reasons to Quit Smoking 26. Experiencing panic-attacks when you’re not able to have a cigarette 27. Freezing outside in bad weather 28. Having money to go back to school, work less hours, or go a vacation 29. Extra money to purchase gift’s for loved ones 30. Hanging out with the mostly unhealthy and pessimistic “smokers” crowd 31. No energy to exercise 32. Three words “sex, impotence, loser” 33. Not being able to a flight climb stairs without losing your breathe 34. The “a smoker” unhealthy life style 35. Low self-confidence of being a smoker 36. People looking down on you for being a ‘smoker’ 37. Being turned down for life insurance 38. Potential employer not hiring you because you’re a smoker 39. Not being able to find an apartment because no one wants to rent to smokers 40. concentration 41. All the interruptions in your life 42. Less running around 43. The negative drain of being addicted to something 44. Non-smoker hate kissing smokers, and most likely will NOT 45. The thought of harming your unborn baby 46. Second-hand smoke kills family members too 47. 75% of children who smoke because their parents do 48. Teens that smoke are seven times more likely do elicit drugs 49. Trips to the convenience store in the middle of the night 50. Waking-up in the middle of the night just to have a smoke Reasons to Quit Smoking 51. Craving a cigarette and being irritated if you don’t get one 52. Less time to spend with your family 53. Less time inhaling toxic poisons 54. Less time inhaling other smokers second hand smoke 55. Never having to sit in another smoke filled room 56. Feeling and looking younger 57. The smell smoke in your hair 58. The smell smoke in your clothes 59. A toxic and cancer filled body 60. Aching joints 61. Muscle pains 62. That constant nagging cough 63. Getting a “colds” all the time 64. A weak immune system 65. Only being able to date less-than-perfect smokers 66. Burning holes your clothes 67. Worrying about burning down your home 68. Worrying about burning down some one else’s property or home 69. Encouraging your children to play with fire 70. Having money to go on “date night” to dinner and the movies 71. Time to start a new hobby 72. Time to start an exercise program 73. Time to clean your body out 74. Finally throwing clothes with burn holes in them 75. Smoking causes infertility Reasons to Quit Smoking 76. Your baby will thank you 77. Your breast milk will be safe to drink 78. All of your family members will be proud of you 79. All of your friends will be proud of you 80. All of your co-workers will be proud of you 81. Having lunch money every day now 82. You won’t ever be called ‘a smoker’ again 83. Having to bum cigarettes from others 84. Worry about going for a long time without a smoke like in a movie or on a plane 85. Sleepless nights 86. The sad fact your first thought in your day is about “smoking” 87. You’ll instantly be sexier and more attractive to people even non-smokers 88. No more excuses about not quitting 89. Literally not being able to smell the roses 90. Other people thinking you’re dim-witted 91. Losing creditability as an professional or expert because of your dumb habit 92. Your mom never asking you to quit again 93. Having the title of “ex-smoker” 94. Quitting before you get cancer or die 95. Proving all those people wrong who said “you’ll never quit” 96. Dying a peaceful death 97. Giving the athletic performance advantage to the non-smokers 98. Burning holes in your carpets 99. Cleaning ashtrays 100. Cleaning up spill tobacco in your purse or desk 101. Hiding the fact you still haven’t quit yet

Right now, please write out your top 10, print it them off, or email them to a friend. I hope you found a long list of reasons to quit smoking now, long enough to easily quit smoking today.

Sources: 1US Surgeon General's Report, 1990, p. vi 2According to the American Cancer Society, the average economic costs of smoking are estimated to be approximately $3,391 per smoker per year *** According for the average inflation cost of Cigarettes **** U.S. Fire Administration. A Profile of Fire in the United States, 1989-1998. 2000. Available online at: www.usfa.fema.gov 5Smoking 25 cigarettes (one pack) a day for an average 4 minutes (smoking and traveling to the designated smoking spot) equals 608 hours and 20 minutes of conscious time per year.

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